Friday, February 12, 2010

Get me a drink ... or I'll start talking Dirty

But first: in honor of Valentine's Day this Sunday, I present one of the funniest explanations of the love day ever written. No, I didn't write it; if I did it wouldn't be funny, cause I don't roll that way, baby. It's from "It's Me, Margie" over at The Lipstick Chronicles, and here ya go with the link, but before I go, big ol' smooches to the ladies of The Seven but hearty handshakes to the gents cause that's the way I roll too:


What do I drink while working? Three things:




Hot and strong, with a splash
of half-and-half.

No sugar, foam or whip.
No caramel, chocolate, Irish creme, hazelnut, blackberry, doughnut, or anything else that smells like it should hang from the rearview mirror of my Civic.

Just plain old Joe. If you please. But only if you'll join me.

For that's the true glory of coffee: the glorious companions the bean draws to my table.

I wish I was wordsmith enough to describe the utter joy of the morning's first sip. Of the gentle caress of hot porcelain on my winter-chilly hand. Of the abstract art the half-and-half makes becoming One with the liquid black.

But I am not skilled enough. I am not worthy.

So allow me to introduce you to someone who is. Who can perfectly explain what I like to call,

An Ode to Hot-Leaded Coffee

And please be sure to watch it all. The end
is the cream in this digital coffee.

Hey, I have a new website! Well, it's the old site, but it's happy shiny fresher now with a brand-new design, new photos, new biography and author Q&A ... and an excerpt from my upcoming thriller, Torn Apart. Click on and let me know what you think!


Jen Forbus said...

I just love Harry...and starting this morning with him made MY day! Thanks Shane. I'll pop over and check out the new design!

Sophie Littlefield said...

hey shane, the new website looks great!

i love girly hazelnut coffee. i know it makes purists insane, an that just makes me love it even more!

Michael Wiley said...

I think that when one lives in Chicago one MUST drink coffee black -- no chasers. It's something about the air. Or the water.

Mysti Lou said...

Aw, way to make me miss the old San Francisco (I *think* the freeway behind Harry fell in the '89 quake? not sure), and burnt coffee in styrofoam cups.

If you come to LCC, the coffee's on me (hold the sugar)!

Sophie--I love the cool flavors you can get during the holidays!!!!

Shane Gericke said...

Thanks, Sophie! I did it solely to justify leaning against a factory wall in leather and jeans :-) Seriously, the designers did a crackerjack job turning Shaneyworld into something nice. My various hats are off to them, cause I know from my experience that building a nice website is NOT easy.

Ah, hazelnut. Of all the flavored coffees, that's the closest to good I can find. I'm no purist on coffee; like Mysti, I can drink overboiled dregs and believe they taste like candy. But most flavors taste so Pine-Sol-artificial they make me shudder.

There MUST be good flavored brands out there, no? If so, let me know. Thoughg if anyone suggests General Foods International Coffees from the '80s ...

... I'm SO outta here.

Shane Gericke said...

Yeah, Jen, isn't Harry the coolest? The movies are awfully dated now, but I still get a tingle when I hear the classic lines.

Michael, I could never learn to like coffee black. I am ashamed of my lack of chestiness about it, but whattaya gonna do, right? But I just use cream, no sugar. That counts as tough, right?

Shane Gericke said...

Mmmmmm, Mysti! Burnt coffee in Styrofoam! Brings me back to my newspaper days, when that's pretty much all we drank. Or, in those years the paper was too damn cheap to have the real deal in the Bunn pots, coffee in little cardboard cups (with ear-flap handles!) that dropped from the vend-all machine for a quarter a gulp. Now there was coffee you could use to grease your typewriter.

Shane Gericke said...

Oh, and everyone, I apologize for today's oddly-spaced paragraphs and jumble of type sizes. Blogger software is a pain in the ass and doesn't do what I ask sometimes. Kinda like me when I don't have enough coffee; ask the missus ...

Kelli Stanley said...

Oh Shane, you always write music to my ears and caffeine aroma to my nose and yummy cuppa Joe taste to my tongue. ;)

I like plain ol' coffee, too ... though like Soph, I admit to an indulgence in flavors during the holiday season. And on occasion, when I can find a really good cafe au lait or latte (hard, actually, in America), nothing ever tastes as good.

Here's to the bean, bro!! With or without additives, it's a lifesaver! :)


Rebecca Cantrell said...

Loved your descriptions of coffee, Shane! I think you are, in fact, worthy

Shane Gericke said...

Rebecca, you're sweet to say so! And Kel, you probably have drunk enough coffee on your tour to float the Queen Mary. To both of you, here's mud in your eye!