Thursday, May 13, 2010

All I Have Are Blood, Sweat and Tears ...

By Shane

Son of a . . .

Sigh. I had this really nice blog written about how I taste death when my characters bleed out. How I laugh when they're having fun, how I cry when they're in pain. (Though I hit my feet with hammers so as not to become all Nicholas Sparks with Feelings.) I was gonna tell you I jump into my characters' heads when I write them, so I can absorb their emotions in order to spray them back, machine-gun-like, on the page. I was gonna tell you I have to do that, in order to create characters that readers love, hate, despise, worship, or root for the claw hammer to win against. So they give a damn about how the story ends. If I don't become the characters as I write, I was gonna say, I will have cheated my readers of the emotional hooks the deserve when they buy my books. If I don't go the extra mile in order to save myself some emotional grief--becoming your characters sucks at your head more than you'd think--I'd wind up giving them the novel equivalent of . . . this . . .



Yeah, I was gonna tell you all about it. But then the blog ate my paper.

No kidding, it did. I had this blog all written, with beautiful artwork and stunning adverbs and prepositional phrases and a few minty-clever phrases like "That dog don't hunt" and "Beam me up, Scotty." Then I hit Preview ...

Ate my work like a ham sandwich.

Why can't Van Damme kick computer software into shape instead of scarred Chinese Mafia guys you don't care about? That would bring some real cheering.

Ah, well, what are you gonna do? Fortunately, the software meanie didn't gobble up everything. Here's two items it managed to avoid:

AND ON A MERRY-DITH NOTE ...

Our own Meredith Cole's second book, DEAD IN THE WATER, launched Wednesday to the applause of everyone who likes top-notch writing. She used to direct feature films and write screenplays, but fortunately for us, chose to start writing mysteries too. Her first, POSED FOR MUDER, was nominated for an Agatha Award, which is a really big deal for a debut. Plus, she's got a kick-ass cover featuring a floating dead woman and a stark bridge and stuff, and she's a cool person too, richly deserving of your support.

SHANE'S HOTEL NIGHTMARE!

Shane Gericke is the bestselling author of TORN APART (launching July 6), CUT TO THE BONE and BLOWN AWAY. He's also chairman of ThrillerFest. So he interviewed himself and discovered this news worth sharing: "If you're planning to attend ThrillerFest in July," he said in a strong yet weary voice resembling the distress of his omnipresent leather jacket, "please note that rooms at the conference hotel--the Grand Hyatt--are almost sold out. There's no problem signing up for AgentFest, CraftFest, ThrillerFest and the Thriller Awards banquet, we've always got room for more." He shook his head, as if saddened like by a tragedy. "But you may find a problem getting a room. Just wanted to mention that if you're hoping to land a bed for the night." Shane, who feels the pain of unfulfilled bed-seekers as if they were noble characters winking out with the final red crest of a dying sun, says you can sign up for ThrillerFest and get further conference details at http://www.thrillerfest.org/. Oh, and you can hang out with him digitally at http://www.shanegericke.com/. He'd enjoy the company. Bring your own leather, though. His is weary and distressed.

10 comments:

Graham Brown said...

Hey Shane - I hate when that happens. And yes I watched most of the Van Dame clip - two questions - why is he fighting people in pink bath robes at the start? And if you were a Chinese mobster, would you not have some sort of machine gun training course so your henchmen could hit SOMETHING with a hundred shots?

All the best - can't wait for Torn Apart. Plus Meridith's cover looks awesome - have to pick that up too.

Sophie Littlefield said...

hey shane, i love that you just interviewed yourself, and you did an admirable job, too!

Big huge congrats to Meredith!!

Shane Gericke said...

If I were a Chinese mobster, Grahamn, I'd have a rocket launcher. Especially if I was wearing a pink bathrobe. But what do I know :-)

Shane Gericke said...

Sophie, you should have seen all the editing I had to do on me. Geez, did I run at the mouth. But at least I bought myself a drink.

Terry Stonecrop said...

That's as bad as having your dog eat your homework. Luckily for you, we're probably more gullible than Mrs. Perkins in fourth grade ever was.

Liked the Chinese Mafia, though, and those books look good.

Shane Gericke said...

Sadly, Terry, the tale is real. I had just finished my winsome ditty and the site software went all killbot on it. I despise this particular blog software--it hardly ever works right. Fortunately, my writing always improves in rewrite, mostly cause I never do it right to start with :-)

Terry Stonecrop said...

I was joshing with you;) I've lost so much stuff, I can't count it. It was a fun post and a great save.

Shane Gericke said...

Sometimes ya can't save stuff fast enough to beat the software monsters ... they're gonna bite yer tush no matter what fancy dance moves ya make ...

Gabi said...

Technology is evil and unfortunately, seems immune to pain although I frequently envision giving it a good "thwack" in the hope that AI might have evolved. It causes us enough pain.

You interviewed yourself? That looks different than talking to yourself how, exactly? Did you ask about wanting to be a Asian mob guy in fluffy Pepto sleeping togs? Maybe these "interviews" should take place on a couch in an imaginary doctor's office.

Kelli Stanley said...

Yay, Meredith!!! Congratulations on your fabulous book!!!

And Shane ... you are just as brilliant with forced impromptu adverbs as you are with prepared prepositions. :)

And look at it this way ... better a blog than the TORN APART manuscript!!

xoxo