Sunday, October 24, 2010

The Police Blotter


Gabriella Herkert

Catnapped and Doggone

Seattle Police Department Blotter

Incident Date: 3 August 2007
Title: Assault of a Police Officer
Summary: A woman was questioned in connection with an injury sustained by a police officer in Pioneer Square. The officer required several stitches to his chin and the woman was rendered unconscious.

Incident Date: 3 August 2007
Title: Filing a False Insurance Document
Summary: A woman was questioned at Swedish Medical Hospital after it was revealed that although she checked single on her insurance intake form two men claimed to be married to her during her physical examination. A medical professional called the police following the incident. The woman cited a psychological condition which was confirmed by one of the witnesses present.

Incident Date: 5 August 2007
Title: Breaking and Entering
Summary: A local law firm reports that at least two incidents of breaking and entering have occurred over the past week. The break-ins were reported by the security company for the building. Despite a security review, the only loss appears to be several bags of chocolate covered caramel candy bars.

Incident Date: 8 August 2007
Title: Assault
Summary: A local woman was questioned in connection with the brutal assault of a well-known local businessman. The woman apparently used a wireless computer keyboard to bash the man several times rendering him insensible. The “k” and “g” keys were also permanently damaged. The keyboard which belonged to a Mercer Island resident was no longer under warranty.

San Diego Police Blotter
Incident Date: 10 September 2007
Title: Unlawful discharge of firearms within the city limits
Summary: The police are looking for a Caucasian man and woman who were involved in a shooting in a known gang location three days ago. The man and woman, both over the age of thirty and appearing not to have a gang affiliation, are wanted for questioning in the death of a local deejay and for the exchange of automatic gun fire in broad day light. Police were made aware of the incident following the arrest of a drug dealer on unrelated charges.

Date: 12 August 2007
Title: Stray Dog
Summary: Animal Welfare was called to the upscale Coronado neighborhood on the report of a stray Labrador mix dog. When Animal Welfare arrived, the dog was gone but a new Chevy Blazer was engulfed in flames at the spot where the dog was previously seen. The dog is not wanted in connection with the damage to the vehicle.

Date: 14 August 2007
Title: Assault and Counter-assault
Summary: The police were called to the San Diego Yacht Club during the Annual Charity Gala. Two female guests were warned following an altercation that became physical. Both guests were wearing the same dress and no one sustained non-emotional injuries.

Stanfield Police Blotter

Date: 17 September 2009
Title: Horse Theft
Summary: The local sheriff Pete Graville was called to his aunt Jill’s ranch after Moon Dance was reported missing through some Seattle law firm and insurance company. Moon Dance wasn’t in the barn. Steven Blair was found dead with a pitchfork sticking out of his chest. Steve’s death appears to be a farm accident.

For all of Sara’s “incidents,” or Russ’ and Connor’s for that matter, she has yet to be formally charged and therefore has a pristine criminal record. Just goes to show you how accurate those are.

Thanks for reading and not filing charges.

Gabi

3 comments:

L'Aussie said...

No charges filed but this is so interesting. Enjoyed the read..:)

Rebecca Cantrell said...

Great list of trouble!

I'm interested to know how she kept charges from being filed. Seems like a handy skill...

Shane Gericke said...

Was the lady wielding the keyboard perhaps a novelist of our acquaintance? Sounds like something a novelist would do ...