To illustrate my point ... by Catriona

What do your writing expenses look like for a conference? (Percentages are fine.) Airfare, hotel, meals, books, booze? What about ROI (return on investment)? Are conferences worth the expense? 

With the divine Mr M, Bouchercon, Raleigh, 2015

Did everyone read Eric yesterday? About how ungrateful it looks when you're nominated for an award and you don't even bother to show up? Well, I'm nominated for two Anthony awards at this year's Bouchercon and I won't be anywhere near it.

Michael Mueller, Kristopher Zgorski and me
 gussied up for the Malice banquet, 2018

Before you judge me, though - I had already committed to appear (and moderate a panel) at Bloody Scotland. Imagine emailing Big Bob McDevitt and saying "Yeah, find someone else, B-Boy, I got a better offer". 

Wee Blaize frae Skye 
at Bloody Scotland 2019

Speaking of Bloody Scotland, though, here's a snippet of info that might make some blood boil. At UK writing festivals . . . they pay the authors' hotel bills and give them a stipend. Doesn't help with the bar bills but it doesn't hurt. Also Britain is a titchy wee country and no one's travel costs very much, unless you decide to go by sedan chair, I suppose.

Banquet table, Left Coast Crime, 2019
when I made nine Americans wear Jimmy wigs

But back to the rough and tumble and six-hour flights on this side of the pond. I don't live anywhere near any of the cons that don't move - Malice Domestic in Bethesda, CrimeBake in New England somehere and Thrillerfest in NYC. So my year always includes that schlepp from Sacramento to Dulles to celebrate traditional mysteries, and a shorter hop to Left Coast Crime - Denver this year, mind you, so not that short - and usually another jaunt to wherever Bouchercon is. I'm going to Calgary next year and DC the year after.

Just about to relinquish the official seal of the office of 
the President of Sisters in Crime, Bouchercon, Long Beach, 2014 

Even with taking the window seat in an exit row on United (where you might have to hold the door closed) this isn't cheap.

When I land, I tell myself I'm using public transport to get to the hotel. I promise myself. I look up how easy and cheap the trains are . . . and book a Lyft. Every time.

Parnell Hall of blessed memory
on his way to his panel at LCC, Hawaii 2014

Then I get to the hotel and start charging eye-wateringly pricy food to my room for three days.

Next, I visit the book room and make it look like an episode of Supermarket Sweep (and that's before attending new authors' breakfasts and thinking they all sound great too). 

Book haul from Malice, 2022

There are two financially repsonsible things I do in the midst of all that. But not for reasons of prudence or frugality. I only ever drink club soda because every other soft drink is too sweet and I don't drink actual drink. And I never ship books home, because I'd rather pack my case with new books and ship dirty clothes. 

I reckon Left Coast Crime in Denver cost $1500 and Malice closer to $2000. 

Did I make that back in sales?

Diana Chambers and I repsonding to that
idea, at Left Coast Crime, Vancouver, 2019 

But, as Gabriel said on Tuesday, that's not in the same hemisphere as the point. Going to cons is about hugging people who're tiny little profile pics for the other fifty-one weeks of the year, hearing those new authors and hoping they don't notice you vampirically feeding off their shiny enthusiasm, hearing from readers of your books who know more stuff than you do, fangirling your favourite authors, getting into a lift with someone holding a book and knowing they want to talk about it and won't get off at the next floor to escape you, sharing imposter syndrome panics, moaning about bits of the industry that seem designed to quash all creativity, and making the memories that will get you through the fifty-one weeks to come.

My mum meeting MC Beaton
at Bloody Scotland 2014

How lucky are we that all of that is tax-deductible?

Cx