Picasso and the Query Letter from James W. Ziskin

What tips do you have to get your query letter noticed and pulled from the slush pile?

Panning for gold in the slush pile

I’m no expert at this, and I worry that any advice I offer may be repeating what Dietrich and Terry put forth earlier this week. But since the gauntlet has been thrown…

My number one personal observation on queries is this: You can lose a lot of points by submitting them the wrong way. The sad truth, however, is that you don’t necessarily win any points for doing them the right way either. 

But at least you don’t lose any.

So what can/should you do to increase your odds of getting an agent or editor to Bite and ask for a partial or complete manuscript?

For starters, DON’T USE A STUPID FONT LIKE THIS ONE!

Try something safe. Maybe Times New Roman or Arial, depending on whether you prefer your text avec or sans serif.

Next…

• Give the reader a reason to read on. If nothing else, your query must compelling.
• To that end, find a hook. A snappy, irresistible opening might intrigue the reader. Sometimes it’s risky to…well…take a risk. But it just might pay dividends. 
• Get to the point right away. The finger is hovering over the delete button... Don’t waste time.
• Be concise. Bauhaus it.
• Be professional and confident. You’re a writer. Show that you’re a professional one. No one ever said, “Oh, this is just too professional. I think I’ll pass.” But one certainly might say, “This is amateurish. I’ll pass.”
• Do your research. Would you send your erotica to an editor who publishes YA?
• Personalize your pitch. Find an agent who likes books like yours and let them know you’ve done your homework.
• Chek yore speling

Now, the best advice I can offer for getting an agent:

If possible, BE RECOMMENDED BY AN EXISTING CLIENT. This won’t guarantee an offer of representation, but it’s almost like getting a private audience. The agent will shut out other distractions—at least for a few moments—and consider your query a touch more receptively. The rest is up to you and your writing.

And, of course, there are some obvious DON’Ts:

• Don’t predict great sales and awards. You’ll sound arrogant or uninformed. Or both.
• By the way, don’t be arrogant. The same goes for entitled and obnoxious. 
• Don’t present yourself with a chip on your shoulder. The writing biz is hard to break into. You’re not the only one swimming upstream, and agents/editors don’t owe you anything.
• Don’t send a form letter. That’s the quickest and surest way to get a rejection.
• Don’t use AI. That’s lazy. And it’s not you besides, is it?
• Don’t try to be cute. (Unless you REALLY are.) Which you’re not.

In sum, don’t lose points by taking chances!

Unless… your pitch is soooo irresistible and breaks all the rules in the right way. I like to use the example below. The two paintings are by the same artist, Picasso. What’s more—believe it or not—they show the same model, his first wife, Olga. The lesson, of course, is that Picasso knew how to draw and paint before he decided to break the rules and create something daring and different. Writers should do the same. (By the way, I believe he and Olga separated shortly after the second painting… Make of that what you will.)

Finally, to echo Terry’s nod to the late Janet Reid earlier this week, I propose you visit Janet’s Query Shark website immediately and often. It constitutes a veritable post-graduate course on query writing. And it’s absolutely free. Janet was a tough teacher, but one who truly wanted to help writers. She was never my agent, but she was someone I always enjoyed meeting and chatting with at conferences. She was generous with her support and advice. I considered her a friend and I miss her.

Here’s the address: https://queryshark.blogspot.com/

Until we meet again, happy querying! (With a normal font and color, of course.)

 *****************

THE PRANK…enigmatic and unnerving. The pace never flags for a second. This is some masterly plotting. I loved it.”

—Liz Nugent, author of Strange Sally Diamond

 

THE PRANK. A picture clipped from Playboy magazine, a missing Swiss Army Knife, and a prank gone terribly wrong conspire to make Christmas 1968 a deadly holiday to remember.

 

“The Holdovers meets The Bad Seed,” THE PRANK features a charming but volatile thirteen-year-old named Jimmy Steuben. He befriends his seventh-grade English teacher, Patti Finch, just days after her boyfriend is killed in an electrocution accident while hanging Christmas lights on his roof. Patti desperately needs respite from her grief, and a chance encounter with Jimmy provides just that. Ignoring the dangers of a potential scandal, the mismatched pair begins spending time together over Christmas break. Patti finds solace in Jimmy’s company; Jimmy discovers desire and infatuation. But what Patti doesn’t know is that it was Jimmy who caused the tragic accident that killed her lover.

From two-time Edgar Award finalist, Anthony, Barry, and Macavity award-winner James W. Ziskin, THE PRANK releases July 2026.

PLACEHOLDER—NOT THE OFFICIAL COVER

808

Alsfkjasdlgkjaslvfjn