He said, she said.

This week we’re talking about dialogue tags, hints, tips and gripes.

by Dietrich

Dialogue Tags

There’s been a lot written about whether dialogue tags should ever be more than ‘he said’ or ‘she said’. 

“While to write adverbs is human, to write ‘he said, she said’ is divine.” 

— Stephen King

“The line of dialogue belongs to the character; the verb is the writer sticking his nose in. But "said" is far less intrusive than "grumbled", "gasped", "cautioned", "lied". I once noticed Mary McCarthy ending a line of dialogue with "she asseverated" and had to stop reading and go to the dictionary.” 

— Elmore Leonard

Okay, some writers think it’s a sin to use more than said, and I don’t usually use more than that. And sometimes a dialogue tag isn’t needed if it’s obvious who’s speaking. 

I go for economy of words to give the text a flow, so ‘said’ usually does the trick for me. Maybe it just comes down to an individual writer’s style. I wouldn’t put a book down just because a writer used babbled, bawled, begged, bellowed, mused, mumbled, moaned, or muttered after a character’s words.

Hints and tips

The best hint or tip or words of advice I can come up with is don’t take too much of it as gospel. If a bit of advice rings true, take it, or whatever part that makes sense, and make it your own. 

Here are a few tips and pearls that work for me. 

“Read, read, read everything – trash, classics, good and bad, and see how they do it. Just like a carpenter who works as an apprentice and studies the master. Read! You’ll absorb it. Then write. If it is good, you’ll find out. If it’s not, throw it out the window.”  

— William Faulkner

“Know you’re writing something good even if nobody else does.”

— Dennis Lehane

“Never tell your reader what your story is about. Reading is a participatory sport. People do it because they are intelligent and enjoy figuring things out for themselves.” ― George V. Higgins

“Present the world as it is, rather than the way the reader wants it to be. I don’t care about twists or manufactured surprises.” — George Pelecanos

“My advice is, ‘Live every day as if your rent is due tomorrow.’”

— Carl Hiaasen

“When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.” — Larry David

“Pay no attention to the criticism of men who have never themselves written a notable work.” – Ezra Pound

Gripes

I’ve been guilty of it, but really, nobody wants to hear it. Maybe griping is like a release valve to let off some steam, but too much of it and it might cloud your day. So, just don’t do it, and don’t hang around it. It’s better to go look for something that doesn’t tick you off. Sorry if that sounds like another tip.

Of Course, It’s Funny; It’s Always About Us.

Can you name a writer or a work that made you Laugh Out Loud? (no inner chuckles)

Paul here, I’m out washing my hair, out of town, on the lam, in hiding, so D.J. Adamson is filling in for me this week. D.J. has a terrific blog and newsletter and a new mystery, Suppose, the second in her Lillian Dove Mystery series. She’s also the author of the Deviation science fiction-suspense trilogy. She also teaches writing and literature at Los Angeles colleges. And to keep busy when she is not writing or teaching, she is the Membership Director of the Los Angeles Sisters in Crime, Vice President of Central Coast Sisters in Crime and an active member of the Southern California Mystery Writers. Her books can be found and purchased in bookstores and on Amazon. To find her, her blog L’Artiste, or her newsletter that interviews and reviews authors go to http://www.djadamson.com. Make friends with her on Facebook or Goodreads.

So take it away D.J.!

Of Course, It’s Funny; It’s Always About Us.

by D.J. Adamson

“It’s the best book ever,” I told the conductor when, traveling on the train to Santa Barbara for a business appointment, he stopped at my seat and asked quietly, “Are you all right?”

I was blubbering like a baby.

Two weeks later, he stopped again. “Best book?”  This time, I was laughing and hooting.

It’s what truly makes a book memorable, isn’t it? The ability of the author to hook into human emotions and not let go. I remember which novel that made me literally sob for its last 150 pages: Dorothy Allison’s Bastard out of Carolina. The novel that embarrassingly caused other passengers to think I’d lost my mind: Heller’s Catch-22.

"They're trying to kill me," Yossarian told him calmly.
"No one's trying to kill you," Clevinger cried.
"Then why are they shooting at me?" Yossarian asked.
"They're shooting at everyone," Clevinger answered. "They're trying to kill everyone."
"And what difference does that make?"

Heller’s use of satire and black comedy to create a statement on the war was hilariously memorable and poignant.

Authors like Stephen King use humor to ease suspense and tension. Some of King’s comedy is horrifically funny…”Here’s Johnny.”  Others use black comedy to take a tragic situation and make a comment about the human response to it:  Vonnegut’s Breakfast of Champions or Slaughterhouse-Five; Adam’s Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy, Toole’s Confederacy of Dunces.

In my own work, I use sarcasm as a humorous means to get my character’s point across, (also to amplify her pent up resentments). I use comedic behavior as a method to demonstrate our continual attempt to “get it.”

I am thinking of my latest Lillian Dove novel Suppose.  Lillian returns to Davenport, Iowa, a city from her dark past, and she spots a dumpster diver she remembers. Now after her sobriety and creating a new reality for herself, she sees herself as having a higher, unique awareness.

My first thought was that it was crazy Ben or a man I’d named Crazy Ben. He was walking the same route with his shopping cart full of ripped, black trash bags and dirty, smaller white grocery bags, holding found treasures. You’d think I’d feel sorry for him. Especially since my life had changed so vastly. I was sober. Getting ahead in life. 

I’d once admired how he always seemed to know where he was going. Sure footed, he’d walked the same route day after day, safe in his routine. Sure of his path. But since my path had taken me elsewhere, I could now understand how a person can get on the gerbil wheel of going nowhere fast. Running to beat hell, around and around and around, only to end up in the same place.

I slowed. Hold it. Where was his cart? The rusty-wired cart with the squeaky wheels? It was never more than ten feet away in case someone came by, saw the value of his valuables, and decided to make them his own. Had he been robbed? The thought melted away my arrogance. It’s hard to come up with an answer, why me and not him? A toss of life’s dice? If I wouldn’t have quit drinking, it could easily be me pushing around the cart, hoping for enough recycle to buy a drink to warm my blood, or finding leftover food so I wouldn’t have to spend any money on nutritional sustenance. 

I pulled over. I should give him a little money. 

When I parked, I checked to see where Ben was and found him straightening up from the trash, his hands full of empty cans. He turned toward me as if he could sense he was being spied upon.

 I was wrong. It wasn’t Ben. What happened to Ben?

Did that make a difference? It wasn’t my Crazy Ben, but it was a Ben nevertheless.  I pulled a twenty out of my billfold and walked over.

As I came closer, he hurried and dumped his cans into a black, trash sack I now saw setting on the other side of the trash can. 

“Here.” I held out the bill.
“Go away,” he yelled.
“No, you don’t understand. This is a gift.”
“Get away from me. I’m not doing no harm.”
“Of course you aren’t.” Poor soul. “Take this. Get a warm meal.”
“I don’t need your money. Get away from me.” 

He snorted a lungful of air through his nose, leaned back, and aimed at huge, blob of spit. If I wouldn’t have moved faster, I’d have been wearing it.

He inhaled another mouthful. 
I raced back to the car. 
What was I doing back here? Why had I come? People don’t change.

She realizes by coming back, she, too, is running in that gerbil wheel. Around, around, around, still trying to “get it” even after five years sober.

Okay, so I am not a Heller, King, or Vonnegut. But I am working to use comedy as a tool for offering a comedic response to the perceptions we make. Especially when we think that somehow we have risen “above” the masses who just haven’t “got it.”

"Catch-22...says you've always got to do what your commanding officer tells you to."
"But Twenty-seventh Air Force says I can go home with forty missions."
"But they don't say you have to go home. And regulations do say you have to obey every order. That's the catch. Even if the colonel were disobeying a Twenty-seventh Air Force order by making you fly more missions, you'd still have to fly them, or you'd be guilty of disobeying an order of his. And then the Twenty-seventh Air Force Headquarters would really jump on you."

--Catch-22

***

Thanks, Diann!

***

Paul here again. If you’re in L.A. I hope you can come to SoCal MWA’s event: Demystifying Writing Software: James Scott Bell, Sharon Goldstein and Tom Sawyer discuss Scrivener, Storybase, Final Draft and Word Tips and Tricks, Saturday October 22, 2016. 2pm. Studio City Library, 12511 Moorpark Street, Studio City, CA  91604. I'll be introducing, so if you have any questions, drop me a line.

Check out Akashic's St. Louis Noir anthology with my short story Deserted Cities of the Heart.

www.PaulDMarks.com

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"Jones the Voice" or "King the Fingers"? by Cathy Ace

What reading material is currently on your nightstand?

By way of full disclosure, I have no books on my nightstand. I never do, because I never read in my bed or bedroom. I know that’s where a lot of reading happens, but not for me. Why? By the time I hit the sack around 1am or 2am after my night-shift writing time, my husband and dogs are fast asleep, so no reading for me.

Also, since I had a new book published this week, and I’m at the stressful final-polishing-before-it-goes-to-my-agent stage of a manuscript, I haven’t the mental capacity to read a book by another author at this point . . . I think my head would explode! But on Friday I’ll email the manuscript, and I’ll be flying to Vegas (it’s Superbowl weekend and Vegas is my preferred place to watch the last game of the season before I sink into withdrawal from general NFL-ness) so I’m looking forward to reading one of two Christmas gifts. Each Christmas my husband and I buy each other a book – we don’t plan it that way, but we always do. As you can see, I have a choice: Tom Jones’s autobiography “Over the Top and Back” (yes, I’ve already looked at all the photos, and they have whetted my appetite); Stephen King’s “Joyland” (yes, I feel bad that I haven’t read it yet!). Tough choice!

Both books will make the trip, both will return home with us. Maybe largely unread – it all depends how Vegas-y our weekend becomes. The good thing is I know I’ll get to read them both, soon – and I still have the chance to decide which to read first.WOOT!

Cathy's second WISE Enquiries Agency Mystery, THE CASE OF THE MISSING MORRIS DANCER, was released in Canada and the USA on February 1st. Library Journal reckons it will "...delight M.C. Beaton and Jeanne M. Dams readers..." and Kirkus said of the four softly-boiled PIs "The diverse sleuths are charming." You can find out more about Cathy Ace, her WISE Women and Cait Morgan Mysteries, and even sign up for her bimonthly newsletter, at her website: http://cathyace.com/

Blog, Tweet, Meet and Greet

There are many different ways for promoting a new book. Which do you feel is the most effective?

by Paul D. Marks

It’s always hard coming at the end of the week.  Other people might have hit points that I hit, though I generally write my articles before our week even begins.  But great minds think alike and all of that ;)

I was going to start off by saying it’s a new world we’re living in with the internet and all.  But it’s not so new anymore, especially as things move more and more quickly all the time.  That said, the internet has opened up a whole new wealth of ways to promote your book. And whether you’re with a major publisher, mid-size or indie publisher you will most likely be the one promoting your book or at least doing 93% of it.

The major publishers push the big authors—you know, the ones who don’t really need it, like Stephen King, Anne Rice, Sue Grafton and John Grisham.  But you and your little book, whether you’re pubb’d by a major, a small publisher or an indie, and who could really use a push, well you’re on your own for the most part. But you can do it. It just takes time, effort and a little money. But not nearly as much money as ad campaigns used to take when your only outlets were print, radio and TV.

The internet gives us: Twitter. Facebook. Goodreads and other similar sites.

There’s also a ton of bloggers who review books or interview authors. Ads in things like E Reader News or Kindle Nation Daily or Kindle Review or the very expensive and choosy Book Bub. Even Facebook ads.

And, of course, there’s the old standbys: word of mouth and personal appearances at bookstores, libraries, reader groups, conventions (like Bouchercon, Malice, Left Coast), etc.

If you’ve got money you can hire a publicist. But, just like with anything or anyone else, some might be good, others not so good. And just because they work for a big company or have a fancy office doesn’t necessarily mean they’re better. When I was working in Hollywood my then-writing partner and I got William Morris as agents (have I told this one before?). We thought it was the best day of our lives.  Celebrated. Flying high. But it turned out to be the worst experience as we were the little fish in the big pond. (But I’ll leave the details for another time.) But the best agent I had was working out of his converted garage when I met him. And he hustled for me. And got me work.  And he was eventually picked up as a VP by another large agency and took me with him. The point I’m making here is don’t let the trappings of a big publicist (or publisher for that matter) fool you into thinking you can sit back and do nothing or let things slide

And today there’s a lot you can do yourself.  So even if you can’t afford a publicist it’s not the end of the world. The advantage of a publicist is that they might have lists or contacts of people who might be interested in your book.  They might be able to talk someone into running a piece on you and your book.  But lists can be bought and with persistence you can get the word out.

The bottom line is write a good book, get the word out any way you can. And hope for good word of mouth because that’s still the gold standard of promotion.  And not necessarily easy to obtain.  But if you have a good book and you’re persistent that just might happen for you.

As to which is the most effective, as the expression goes, there’s more than one way to skin a cat.*

There’s not one way that’s best or most effective. The most effective thing is a combination of various methods working symbiotically with each other. Each thing mentioned above works with and pays off each other, but you have to find what works for you. (And any old excuse to put in a cute cat pic.)

*No cats were skinned in the making of this blog post.